Settling Is Not An Option.

Everyone settles. There is not one single person in this world that hasn't settled on something in their life. Whether it be your job, house, significant other, even the people that you have considered your friends over the years, settling happens. We settle thinking that we will find no better, we settle out of desperation, we settle because we do not believe in ourselves enough to reach for what we deserve. Sometimes we don't even realize that we are settling until we look back at our lives and see the flaws in our ways. The need for something so strong that we will settle, even if that means changing the way we feel, in an attempt to avoid regret.

Settling is too easy; It's the waiting that is the difficult part. Settling means that you are compromising something that you want/believe in for something that is less than you deserve. Settling means that you are okay with getting less than you deserve. Settling means that you do not feel good enough about yourself to work for the thing that you most desire. Settling means that you have given up. Why would you want to settle for something that is less than you because you are afraid of taking a chance and waiting to see what comes next?

While waiting leaves us with the feeling of uncertainty, it is the possibility that comes with it that can provide us with so much more. It is a tiring process and leaves us sometimes with more confusion than anything, it still provides us with more insight to ourselves verses settling. Working for something in your life gives you such a greater sense of accomplishment than giving into something that could only give you a small sense of happiness. You have the choice to wait for the things that you are truly striving for or you can settle. You have the choice to hold out for the things that you believe in or you can settle. When it comes down to it, don't settle for something that isn't going to make you happy. If you are settling right now, what do you imagine your future to be like? Think higher of yourself and know that you are worth more than the bare minimum. Strive for your dreams and never settle for anything less than that.

When I look back at my past, I settled in every way you possibly could. I settled with "friends", knowing that their habits and their ways were no good for me, but they wanted to hang out with me. I settled on substances to make me forget, so I didn't have to feel pain because I didn't want to feel as much as I did anymore. I settled on jobs that did not make me happy and added no value to my life, because I didn't think I had what it took for the job I really wanted. I settled on my looks and health, thinking I can't do any with the genes that I have been dealt. Even in every relationship I have had, I have settled. Whether it has on the boy in general or the actions that they have used with me, I settled on whatever they could give me, thinking that either I was never going to find better or that I actually wanted the things that they told me I wanted. I was actually okay with only seeing him once a month or that it was completely normal to talk only once a week. None of the things I had done in my past were alright because I had settled.

Settling is not an option anymore. It came clear to me this weekend when I had realized that my ex was not there for me when my best friend had passed away, a time when you need someone the most. Surprisingly he had sent me flowers before he had passed, which was a kind gesture that I had never expected from him, but it was after a friend had suggested it to him. While flowers and cards mean something in that time of need, it is about physically being there for that person. I had friends who were states away checking on me, busy friends who called, people who I hadn't seen in years who had sent messages, even complete strangers who were sympathetic to the situation, more so than someone who had been in my life for so long and had disappeared yet again. It was in that moment I stopped feeling sorry for myself and the situation I had put myself in with him and grew stronger. No longer was I going to let his actions affect me the ways that they have in the past. No longer was I going to settle on what little he was giving me and thinking that it was a great deal coming from him. Toby deserved more than that and so do I. Settling is not an option anymore.



 Song on Repeat for the Week: "Roar" - Katy Perry. If you have not heard it, you have been living under a rock. Look up the lyrics, rock out to it until you are absolutely sick of it (Which hasn't happened to me yet.) So motivational in more ways than one and is a great song to keep you pushing through.